Clarkey's 2004 Movie Roundup

THE TOP TEN WORST

10. Twisted

Ashley Judd, Samuel L. Jackson and Andy Garica all should’ve said no to this shitty ass movie which story has been done all too often.

9. Taking Lives

Another all-star cast in a long, boring and stupid movie.

8. Garfield

CGI cat, but real dog equals complete stupidity.

7. White Chicks

Normally the Wayans are funny, but not this time as the ugliest and fakest crossdressers I have ever seen in a movie.

6. Scooby-Doo 2

The first one sucked and so does this one.

5. The Big Bounce

Owen Wilson should not be in movies!

4. Envy

Good cast, but a very boring, uneventful and unfunny story.

3. Soul Plane

Why do these movies even get made?

2. Connie & Carla

Just stupid, trying to take a new spin of the crossdressing and it doesn’t work at all.

1. You Got Served

Should’ve never been made at all.

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THE TOP TEN SURPRISES

10. Mean Girls

Think it’s just another stupid chick comedy, well think again, it is pretty funny and the hot girls also help.

9. Saw

The most disturbing movie I’ve seen in a long time, but they need to tone down the overacting.

8. Cellular

I thought it was going to suck, but it turned out to be enjoyable.

7. Miracle

Went in with little expectations, came out amazed. One of the better hockey movies in the last little while.

6. Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle

Best stoner movie since Dazed and Confused.

5. Ladder 49

A solid effort from everyone involved, even though I thought it wasn’t going to be that good.

4. The Notebook

One of the few chick flicks that I really got into, except when the old people would come on and it would get really boring.

3. Napoleon Dynamite

Even with all the hype, I still didn’t think it was going to be good, but it’s a sssswwwweeeeeeetttttt movie.

2. Man on Fire

Didn’t know what to expect, but was blown away by another Denzel performance, the awesome direction of Tony Scott and the gory violence.

1. Paparazzi

There was nothing else out on it’s opening weekend, so I went and saw it and it’s a solid movie, people.

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THE TOP TEN DISAPPOINTMENTS

10. The Alamo

The trailer made this movie look like one of the better movies coming out and I thought it would be a solid movie, but it just didn’t deliver.

9. Envy

I knew that it wasn’t going to be good, but I never would’ve guessed that it was so horribly done.

8. The Punisher

Not all superhero movies are meant to be and this was one of them.

7. I, Robot

Will Smith normally make enjoyable movies and this one looked like another one, but it just didn’t deliver as I would’ve liked.

6. The Village

M. Night Shyamalan is one of the better directors out there nowadays, but his latest effort is definitely his worst effort. I still enjoyed parts of it, but not as much as I thought I was going to.

5. The Clearing

Willem Dafoe and Robert Redford are two solid actors, but this movie just plainly sucked, it was long, boring, dragged-out and it was a huge letdown for me.

4. Taking Lives

When I first saw the trailer for this movie, I was soaked, I wanted to see it. But when I finally saw it, I was let down hugely by the boringness and the stupidity of it.

3. Van Helsing

Hugh Jackman and Kate Beckinsale and famous monsters looked to be good, but it just fell flat on it’s face.

2. Starksy & Hutch

The trailers splashed the names of Todd Philips, Vince Vaughn and Ben Stiller. The movie looked to be great, but it just didn’t deliver like it could’ve had.

1. Day After Tomorrow

I thought that for sure this movie would be on my top 10 best movies list. That’s how much I was looking forward to it, but it proved to be another movie that didn’t live up to it’s potential and left me feeling robbed.


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